Teary Green Eyes
by dickgraysonfan101
Summary: When 16 year old Dean goes through serious Depression because of how he is being treated from his father. He starts to getting addicted to his own self harm, worrying Sam and Bobby. Which ending in a horrific ending. Warning: suicide or attempt, (Based on a nightmare I had of Dean.) (Short Chapters/short story) Part two is in my stories, it's called "fault"
1. Chapter 1

Dean had just turned 16, and what a bust. Dreaming of the Asian Beauties under his pillow, it wasn't because he was a teen boy who was craved sex, he craved the skin on skin human contact and emotion.

"Dean can I go outside?" Asked a 12 year old Sam, who stared out the window for a good hour before asking.

Dean sighed, "You know how Dad feels about that."

"He doesn't have to know, _please_?" Sam pleaded giving big puppy eyes that made Dean weak.

"Fine, be back before Dad does-" Dean started to say but Sam was already out the door to hangout with a girl next door named Jessica. Half hour later, John was back and was angry. He saw Sam duck behind a bush outside the hotel room, avoiding the Impala as it pulled up.

"Dean I told you to not your brother outside!" John yelled storming into the room, with Dean tossing the magazine to the side as he fell off the bed in shock.

"Look Dad I can explain," Dean said on defense. "Sam's been in all day, and I just though-"

*Whack* John had just punched Dean in the eye, knocking him to the ground, but Dean got up like a good hunter and soldier going on offence mood.

*Whack* Again, this time in Dean's gut, making him lose breath and pant frequently as he fell onto his knees. Getting his hair pulled as he got his face smashed into the ground, still out of breath, John kicked him. "Get up!" He yelled as Dean stood up shaky legged only to be beat down again. Bruised ribs, black eye, bloody lip, and dislocated shoulder, Dean was on the ground teary eyed, trying to himself together, only knowing if he cried John would beat him more.

Neither one of them had noticed Sam watching in shock, this was the first time he saw this happen, and it won't be the last. Seeing Dean broken down in the corner, trying to collect himself.

"Dad? Dean?" Sam asked not even sure it was them.

"We are to speak of this Sam, _to anyone,_" John said packing a bag. "You guys are staying with Bobby, another job came up."

* * *

"What happened to you boy?" Bobby asked as Dean and Sam got out of the car.

"Fell," Dean replied making Sam wince at this.

"Pretty nasty fall," Bobby said eyeing Sam who looked really upset. "Come on y'idjit lets get your shoulder back in place." Bobby said guiding Dean to the house.

"Remember Sam, no one," John said from the drivers seat making Sam cringe more. How could Dad, a father ven do that? Does he feel anything about what he did to his son?


	2. Chapter 2

"On three Dean, 1-" Bobby popped it back in making Dean take in a sharp breath.

"Son of a bitch," Dean moaned lightly.

"How did you fall boy?" Bobby asked, questioning how bad this fall was.

"I was being stupid... again. I was standing on a hotel counter, my sleeve got caught and I slipped." Dean said casually.

"I'd think you'd learn from the first time you've done that, or second." Bobby replied disinfecting Dean's lip, as Sam just stared during this whole conversation. How many times has this happened? When Bobby left grabbing them something to eat, leaving the two alone Sam needed to ask.

"Dean?" Sam asked getting Dean's attention from spacing out the window.

"Yeah Sammy."

"How long as this has this been going on?" Sam asked worried.

"What? Me falling? You know me I'm accident-prone," Dean said giving a weak smile.

"That's not what I meant and you know it."

Dean sighed, "A couple of years now, it's okay I'm used to it" Dean said looking away clearly not used to it, it completely made him lifeless, only filled with pain and hurt.

"It's- it's not okay..." Sam said looking down, clinching his fists, starting to have hot tears run down his face.

"Woah! I'm fine, I'm a soldier, Dad's just training me." Dean lied, which he tried his best it came out like sarcasm.

"Dean this isn't right," Sam said hugging his brother making Dean wince in the pain.

"What isn't right?" Bobby asked coming back with bag of burgers.

"Hunting," Dean said, gaining an upset Sammy, who stormed out past Bobby.

"Well I agree with you there, what's wrong with Sam?" Bobby asked with Dean replying with pursed lips and shrug.

"I'm not very hungry," Dean said also storming out, thanks to Sam he was starting to fall apart.

* * *

Dean locked the door to the room was staying in behind him, falling onto the ground. Still weak from what happened the day before, he hated when he was like this, he felt more weak when he started to weep. Wiping his teary green eyes into his sleeve, also biting the side of his shirt so his cries were silent. He truly hated himself, he deserved this. That's all he could think, it was his fault, and how he felt weak for wanting to cry, show his emotions, and not be a soulless mercenary for his father.


	3. Chapter 3

A few days passed, Bobby tried to speak with Sam and Dean on what's wrong with them but no luck. Bobby worried the most about Dean, he wouldn't eat, sleep, he even found razor blade cuts on Dean's upper arm when they were working on cars. Dean seemed... lifeless. This went on yet another week, then when John came by earlier than expected because the hunt was a bust. But he had another one, he just stopped by to say a few words of "encouragement" to his sons.

"Sam remember," John said pointing to his head. "Dean I need to speak with you," looked at Sam, "Alone."

"Yes Dad," Dean said dragging his feet as he followed his Dad to the auto-junk yard.

"You do realize why the werewolf hunt was a bust right?" John asked popping his next.

"No? Should I?" Dean asked rocking on the balls on his feet.

"Someone never packed the sliver bullets," John said making Dean start to tremble in fear.

"I'm sorry it won't happen again, I promise to always pack them for now on." Dean said trying to hold still from running, he knows if he did it would be a much worse out come. Dean got what he expected, punch o his gut, almost making him gag. Clutching his stomach as John put a hand on Dean's shoulder.

"I'll make sure of it," he said as he punched Dean in the mouth.

* * *

"What's wrong with you two?" Bobby asked Sam, who was reading a book on the couch.

"Dad says we're not suppose to talk about it," Sam replied with pain in his voice.

"Clearly we need to, what the hell is going on?"

* * *

"Dad I'm so sorry," Dean said on all fours spitting blood onto the hard rocky ground.

"I have to go, you look like shit," John said leaving Dean there, a blubbering mess.

* * *

"I gotta go, be good Sam and remember." John said glaring at Sam who was talking with Bobby.

"Where's Dean?" Bobby asked a slight growl in his voice, Sam hadn't told him anything but he could start to get that John was a factor to Dean hurting himself.

"Outside, he'll be in soon-" Sam grabbed med-kit and ran outside as fast as he could to Dean, who was clearly hurt.

"Dean?" Sam asked worried trying to clean Dean's lip.

"I- I'm fine," Dean said pushing it away, running back inside the house going to his room and locking it.


	4. Chapter 4

Sam had enough, Dean wasn't confronting this, and he knew Dean wasn't eating or sleeping but what Bobby's news he was about to hear... Was going to send him over the edge.

"Sit down Sam, we need to talk about Dean." Bobby said worried, Sam has never seen Bobby like this before.

"You've noticed Dean hasn't been sleeping?"

"Yeah..." Sam replied solemnly.

"He hasn't been eating, which is really strange because Dean eats like a lumber jack."

"Yes? Where is this going?" Sam asked.

"Have you noticed the cuts on Dean's arm?" Bobby asked.

"What?"

"When we were working on some cars, he had his sleeves rolled up and I saw them. I just assumed it was from a hunt, but these were new, less than an hour new. So when Dean went out, god knows where. I found his razor blades." Bobby explained, he always considered Sam and Dean his sons, and now that Dean has been shutting down, it was a horrible feeling for him.

"What's been going on? And don't say we're not suppose to talk about it, because this IS what you talk about."

"Dad's been abusing Dean!" Sam yelled, finally having enough, he knew his brother's life was on the line now.

"How long?" Bobby demanded to know.

* * *

Dean couldn't do it anymore, he didn't know why Dad had hated him so much, which didn't matter now cause he hated himself too. Reaching out, reaching for a relief, and cutting wasn't working anymore. He needed to cope with this pain somehow. He sat in the dark room, curtains closed, lights out, in the corner rocking back and forth. Eyes drained of tears, sleepiness was over him, but the nightmares were to much. He could stand another nightmare of thinking Sam was in his spot. Hunger, food made him sick, even pie, burgers, even something healthy made him want to puke.

He looked down at his hands, he was still covered in blood and dirt. So getting up to wash it off, he hadn't really thought of the hidden Valium in the medicine cabinet.

* * *

"Dean said a couple years, I first saw it happen last week, for letting me go outside. Dad knew I'd tell you, so he kept saying 'remember', remember not to tell anyone. What troubled me the most, is Dean going along with it, like it never happened." Sam stuttered, angry, clinching his fist tempted to track down John and give him a piece of his mind.

* * *

Dean starred at the bottle in his hand, it felt like so much power, so much hope in it. Then he opened it.


	5. Chapter 5

**N/A Short chapter, and last chapter. "Fell on Black Days" by Soundgarden you should listen to during this chapter to I don't know how to say, this song makes it more real. (this song was on Supernatural 8x06)**

* * *

Holding the open bottle, sucking in a deep breath and wiping his teary green eyes, locking the bedroom door then walking back to the bathroom. Feeling so much pain, it was unbearable, he wanted it to stop, all of it. Taking one pill placing it his palm, swallow.

* * *

"Where's Dean now?" Bobby asked.

"In his room, I can hear Fell On Black days blasting," Sam replied.

"We should check on him, he better not be cutting again," Bobby said with slight pain and hurt in his voice.

* * *

Three pills down, he felt a little loopy, taking another, this time two at a time.

"I... I don't want this, I don't want to be tortured anymore, I don't want to live," Dean hummed rocking back and forth, taking a handful amount already feeling droopy and sick. He swallowed with troubling, chocking on them, holding his mouth shut as he his face became damp once again. He fell onto the ground with a thud, the rest spilling around him, his eyes staring blankly at the ceiling above him.

* * *

"Dean open the door!" Bobby yelled loudly over the music, after a couple minutes he busted the door down with his foot. Not seeing him immediately, he stormed to the open bathroom door, seeing the spilt pills and a passed out Dean on the hard ground lifeless.

"Stay back Sam!" Bobby demanded as Sam entered the bedroom, he didn't want him to see his brother like this.

"Come on Dean get up, please be alive," Bobby said holding Dean up, still nothing, until Dean chocked a few words.

"Tell Sammy I'm sorry..." Dean said falling into lifelessness and shutting his eyes. Sam ran in seeing Dean, he grabbed Dean and cried into him.

"_Dean!_..." Sam cried clutching onto him.

* * *

**May do part two, if I get a request for it. And yes Pt. 2 you would know what that means. So decide your ending, happy? or Sad? tell me, I need to know!**


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